Of course, some grief is heavier than others. Only this morning, we lost a dear woman who had been battling pancreatic cancer for the past 10 months. She was an amazing woman of courage, faith, generosity and optimism. She was an inspiration to many and she will be sorely missed.
When faced with grief, I think many of us struggle with two questions:
- Is God really good if He allows such grief in the world?
- What will the future be like? Will I be able to move on?
We find ourselves coming face to face with the reality that loss and death are inevitable. "I am guaranteed to lose every earthly thing I have ever possessed...I will lose every single person I have ever loved." One Thousand Gifts (pp.84-85). I don't like the fact that I am not God and I cannot control my own reality. I really have no control, even though I live with the illusion of being in control.
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There is something very healing, almost magical, about deciding that I am not the one calling the shots. I am not God, but I can trust God. If He truly is Love, and "All things work together for good for those that love God" (Romans 8:28) then I can rest in His arms, with my head against His chest, and experience His strength and comfort.
Little by little, I can begin to step out again, opening myself up to others because of the love of my heavenly daddy, trusting in His care and His timing, knowing that He is always by my side. I will find flowers among the ashes and sunlight behind the clouds. I will know joy again.
Then one day I too, with trust and excitement, will hold my daddy's hand and cross over into the place where there is no more grief, loss or pain. What a day that will be!